Monday, September 26, 2011

Second blogfest challenge: Food for the Imago




Food for the Imago

Final report of Prof. Nobelium Sewer, 48th Jovember, 3011.

Subjects 1 – 102 developed the usual symptoms of Lacuna Carcinoma and were jettisoned. Yet 103 lived, and continues to grow at a prodigious rate. I have recorded detailed bioscans in the central comlog, but make this statement now for the remnants of humanity in the Oort cloud. They call me the hero of the Designing Nature Association, but as I look into the mirror, my eyes deny that lie.

Fibrosarcoma had claimed all imagines thus far, despite my team’s best efforts. The task of engeneering a human brain into an Exeogen carcass seemed insurmountable, even to us. Then last evening, as Ganymede rose across the face of Jov, the 103rd Imago evolved. The synchronicity of this timing -- on the very day Earth succumbed to the swarming Miasma -- cannot be denied.

Over 100kg already, number 103 regards me with something close to intelligence in its flitting eyestalks. Hungry again already, it oscitates its mandibles greedily. But there is no digestible biomass left on the station. Alone now, and with no resupply for three cycles, I don't know how I will keep it alive. This creature is now our only hope.
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Edit (30th Sep)

Thanks everyone for all your comments. I love you all. I am #103 please continue to vote if you like it!

I hope this isn't considered cheating, but I updated the story when I realised I had forgotten to insert a mirror reference. I can't believe I missed that one! Please consider me disqualified if this is against the rules, but I figured it would be okay until the entries close on Monday.

T.B



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Monday, September 19, 2011

Worst movies ever

So it seems like everyone is doing this, and so after slamming my head against the wall at some other bloggers choice, I thought i'd throw my own into the mix.

It would be easy to go to the IMDB and just pick the random worse rated, but lets shake it up a little. This is my list of the worst 10 movies that other people tend to like.

1, Incendes.

When did rape and incest make a bad film good. It was like people were coerced into liking this from some form of middle class guilt. Sometimes terrible things are just that, and nothing can be learned, nor enjoyed from watching it. It should have been called Incesties.

2, Forrest Gump.

Sigh. This one is going to sting, but any film whose central message is that the ultimate form of goodness and spiritual enlightenment is essentially to get a lobotomy needs to be forgotten.

3, Harry Potter (all of them)

Now settle down, I havent read the books and I'm sure they are all just flipping brilliant, but the films are next to unwatchable. I like a complex plot as much as the next guy, but just how many contrivances can one movie have? After the 10th McGuffin I wanted to gouge my eyes out.

4, Avatar

I hate this film. It is anti science, anti intellectual, and anti fun. Even dragons couldn't save this one. The experience was almost exactly like eating an entire packet of m&m's: colourful, sweet, but very quickly nauseous.

5, Inception

One day all the people who liked this film will wake and realise it was all a drrrreeeeaaammmm. Needlessly complex to the point of being obtuse.

6, Citizen Kane

One day I will drink enough coffee to stay awake through this one. But it hasn't happened yet.

7, The Green Mile

When will people realise that the 'magic black man' trope is more racist than the KKK. I hate this film, mostly because they were obviously trying to make "The Shawshank Redemption 2"

8, There Will be Blood

Maybe, but call me when it gets here, in the meantime I will watch another episode of Deadwood.

9, In Bruges

Soooo many people I know loved this film. The same people insisted I would too. They were wrong. One of the few films I have ever walked out of.

10, Revenge of the Sith

I could not bring myself to make this list without putting this monstrosity on it. Everyone says it was the best of the prequels, as if one kind of shit is better than another. There is only one thing to say about this movie: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

There you have it. Hate away, haters.

T.B

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Competitions are fun. Let's do another one.

I finally got some time to update the map. I was never really happy with it: the fonts were wrong and the colour balance and compas didn't sit right with me.

Luckily I have a student who is a bit of a calligrapher, and she helped me out with some awesome dragons. I was going to get her to do all the place names too but that seemed monumental, and she really needed to spend her time actually doing her school work. Anyway, thanks Jasmine for your help. You have been added to the long list of acknowledgements for this book.

But the point of this post is to announce a little competition of my own. I've been inspired by the blog campaign, and so my plan is to have some fun. This one is easy:

In 150 words or less, describe one of the places on the map. Be creative (of course) have fun, and don't worry about whether your conception of a place matches what it might be in the book.

One of the hardest things about writing is setting down a short concise description of a setting without eating up 1000 words, so lets see what you've got.

Post your entries in the comments below, and I will announce the winner on the 22nd of September, Australian time. Say around 8.30pm.

Oh yeah, and the winner will get an A3 full resolution print of the map mailed to wherever in the world they might be. For whatever it's worth i'll even write my name on the back and say something nice about you.

Spread the word

T.B.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

first campaigner challenge

This one is called: Almost there


 The door swung open and I hesitated, imagining being scissored between it and the metal wall. In that moment the desperate thousands at my back surged forward.

Pushed into the crowded wedge I barely had time before the airlock closed. My ears popped as we rotated into the docking yard. Almost there. I thought, smiling.


The ship was huge but the hangar was bigger; a cavern of steal and chrome and spun diamond. Hundreds of other hopefuls were already rushing towards the access ramps and I ran with them -- forgetting to keep hold of my cloak.


There was a shout. An instant later a police tendril found me, wrapping about my waist and digging into my flesh.

'Illegal mutation,' the mechanical voice screeched above the sudden screams.


The robe that had hidden my scales fell from my face as I was lifted above the crowd. I could see the ship clearly now; sleek as a sparrow with a beak twice as sharp, pointed into space.


The tendril placed me back into the airlock, almost gently. The last thing I saw through the open hangar bay, was the broken moon beyond, falling slowly to earth.


Then the door swung shut.



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