3rd campaigner challenge
Vector Prime
The sun was a slow bubble of molten slag pulling away from the
horizon. Nored watched it rise, all the while aware of the body behind him. The
warmth of the new day was starting to make it smell.
Finally it was time. He sighed and touched the metal band on his
thumb to his lips.
‘Jaiin?’ his own voice rang loud in his ears, hollow. The
Synbatec satellite would be in range now, but his ring hissed static.
-ored? --epeat.’ Between bursts of white noise he could make out
his commanders voice. He held his ring higher as if that would help.
‘I lo-ca-ted Ta-cer. Tar-get down.’ He spoke each syllable
separately, slowly. ‘Re-bel a-gent is down. Re-peat. A-gent is down. I am rea-dy
for pick-up.’
As he waited for Jaiin’s reply, the breeze brought the smell of
the body to his nose. He could almost taste the burnt flesh.
‘Nore-- --reter--t,’ The static made her words nonsense. ‘-- was
to –-- --- pan-e- -- er--'
‘Ple-ase re-peat. Did. Not. Copy.'
'Tac— is ---e—-‘
‘Jaiin. Repeat!’
He sighed again. The nuke must have wiped out more comsats than command
had foreseen. He swore, looking up at the moon. It was a pale disk in the dawn
but the mushroom cloud had drifted with the rotation and looked like scar on
the ancient cratered face. That would teach the rebels not to fuck with earth. He
started to laugh.
‘Nored.’ Jaiin’s voice came as clear now as if she sat beside
him. ‘Tacer is infected. He was to release a pandemic on earth. He is the prime
vector. Virus is airborne. Do not engage. Repeat. Do not engage. Over.’
Nored turned around. Tacer’s charred lips were pulled back from
his remaining teeth, almost smiling.
Wow, I love it!! Great entry for the challenge! Following along :)
ReplyDeleteI'm entry #5
Thanks Jess.... I freaked out today when I realised entries were closing. Just got it in!
ReplyDeleteAwesome! The last line is perfect.
ReplyDeleteooh, nice twist. good job!
ReplyDeleteGreat use of words and excellent twist. Good job, got my vote.
ReplyDeletemood
(now following even)
Moody Writing
@mooderino
no. 79
Radio static. Brilliant! That's a new twist on the challenge words. Got to love a military story. :)
ReplyDeleteLove the way you used the words! Very creative! :)
ReplyDeleteSuper creative, great entry! :)
ReplyDeleteI love this :-) And I'll agree with the others, excellent use of the words.
ReplyDeleteTB, this entry was worth waiting for! First, I love how you got the challenge words in as static. And I love, LOVE, the twist at the end!
ReplyDeleteNot the sort of visual story I should read while eatting lunch! Nice job. Mine is #56
ReplyDeleteUnexpected surprise ending. Well done!
ReplyDeleteThis is the beginning of a book I'd like to read! Great job...I'm in!
ReplyDeleteMakes me think of post-apocalyptic fiction.
ReplyDelete